Big Man on Mulberry Street (Library)

It’s been forever since my last update. Sorry mom, sorry sisters, sorry Bridget, sorry random Facebook creepers. I know that must have been rough on you. No huge events have passed, other than seeing Joseph Levitt Gordan and somehow NOT marrying him on sight. I think it had something to do with the fact that he didn't see me, because if he had, one look at my eyes would have let him know that we are perfect for each other and that's marriage on the spot would be the best idea ever. But anyway, here’s a list of things Billy didn’t teach me about New York city since I last wrote:

1. Just because you seem to know everybody you run into at a play at NYU, and feel like a big man on campus, does not mean that you do in fact know everybody you see there. So when Haley Joel Osmant looks familiar, its not because he was your friend from summer camp, it’s cause he saw dead people. Try not to say “hi” to him and embarrass yourself as I have done.

2. The New York Public Library is the most intimidating place on earth to enter by yourself for the sake of browsing and wandering. If you don’t walk in like you own the place, you will be frightened, lost, and possibly accused to stealing a book that was already in your purse when you walked in. If you really want to become a member of the New York Public Library system chose a nice, small friendly one, like the branch on Mulberry Street in SoHo. Sure they don’t have every book known to man kind, but at least all the librarians are really sweet and cute.

3. If you buy a loaf of bread, peanut butter, jelly, and cheddar cheese you won’t have to go back to the grocery store for an entire week if you leave the bread in the fridge. On that note, I haven’t become any less frightened of the inside of my oven.

4. The East Village is full of grown up hipsters and their children are mini-hipsters. I have nothing more to add to this, other than don’t be alarmed when you see little girls getting their fashion style from Zooey Deschanel and little boys wearing plaid shirts with grey jeans.

5. And most importantly: Keep your eyes peeled. Celebrities are always around. No Billy sightings yet, but I’m sure that’s only because Billy is waiting to reveal himself to me when he’s most needed.